PCOS and the Price Women Pay for Society’s Ignorance

I am not a doctor. I am not an aproko doctor, nor am I Dr. Mohammed Usman of the Nigerian Association of Resident Doctors (NARD). I do not pretend to understand medicine beyond what ordinary people read, hear, or experience through others. But sometimes, life throws a story at you so loudly that ignorance is no longer an excuse for silence. I recently came across a video of a woman being bullied on what should have been one of the happiest days of her life, her wedding day. She was mocked online for her size, ridiculed for being “too big,” and questioned for daring to be loved by a man. In a later interview, the woman calmly revealed that she lives with Polycystic Ovary Syndrome, commonly known as PCOS. That moment struck me deeply. It was not the first time I had heard a woman mention PCOS, and sadly, it will not be the last. Each time the condition is mentioned, it is often tied to shame, bullying, or silent suffering. That realisation is why this article exists.

Today, PCOS is not a rare condition, nor is it a moral failure. It is a hormonal disorder that affects millions of women across the world, many of whom do not even know they have it. The condition interferes with how a woman’s ovaries function, leading to hormonal imbalance that can affect menstruation, weight, fertility, skin, hair growth, and mental health. Yet, despite its prevalence, PCOS is poorly understood outside medical spaces. In everyday conversations, it is reduced to “weight problems” or dismissed as laziness, gluttony, or poor lifestyle choices. This reduction is not only inaccurate; it is cruel.

Now, for many women, PCOS begins as confusion. Periods become irregular or disappear for months. Weight increases rapidly despite careful eating or exercise. Acne persists beyond teenage years. Hair begins to grow in places society has decided women should not have it, while hair on the head thins. These changes often occur without warning, and when they do, women are rarely met with empathy. Instead, they are questioned, teased, or judged. Friends, relatives, and even strangers feel entitled to comment on bodies they do not understand. Over time, the woman internalises the blame, even though her body is responding to a hormonal condition beyond her control.

Pathetically, the bullying that comes with PCOS is often subtle but persistent. It appears in jokes about body size, backhanded compliments about appearance, unsolicited advice on dieting, and cruel remarks disguised as concern. On social media, it is louder and more vicious. Women are compared, shamed, and scrutinised under impossible beauty standards that leave no room for medical realities. The bride who was mocked online is not an isolated case; she is a reflection of how society polices women’s bodies, especially when those bodies do not conform.

Beyond the physical symptoms lies a heavier burden, mental and emotional distress. Many women living with PCOS struggle with anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem. The constant battle with their own bodies, combined with societal judgment, creates a cycle of shame and emotional exhaustion. Imagine waking up daily feeling like your body is betraying you, while the world reinforces that belief through careless words and harsh stares.

Over time, PCOS becomes not just a health condition but an identity crisis forced upon women. In cultures where a woman’s value is closely tied to fertility, PCOS carries an additional weight. The condition is one of the leading causes of difficulty with ovulation, making conception more challenging for some women. This reality alone is emotionally draining, but it becomes unbearable when combined with cultural pressure, intrusive questions, and assumptions about womanhood. Many women with PCOS live in quiet fear, fear of not being “enough,” fear of disappointing family expectations, fear of being reduced to what their bodies may or may not produce.

What makes PCOS particularly painful is how invisible it often is. There are no casts, no bandages, no outward signs that scream illness. So women are expected to function normally, smile through discomfort, and explain themselves repeatedly. Worse still, many go undiagnosed for years, dismissed by healthcare providers or told their symptoms are exaggerated. By the time they receive a diagnosis, the emotional damage is already done.

Right now, It is important to say this clearly, PCOS is not a punishment, and it is not a failure of discipline. It is a medical condition that deserves understanding, proper healthcare, and compassion. Women living with PCOS are not weak; they are navigating a complex health challenge in a world that rarely gives them grace. Their bodies are not problems to be solved or mocked, they are realities to be respected.

If menstruation is a woman’s first painful awakening to how her body is misunderstood, and childbirth one of its most demanding trials, then PCOS sits quietly between them as one of the most emotionally damaging experiences many women endure. Not because it is the worst condition medically, but because it combines physical discomfort, social stigma, and psychological strain in a way that few people acknowledge.

The least the Nigerian society can do is learn. Learn to pause before commenting on a woman’s body. Learn to listen when women speak about their health. Learn that not every visible change has a visible cause. And most importantly, learn that empathy costs nothing, but ignorance costs women their peace.

PCOS should not be another insecurity women are forced to carry alone. It should be a conversation we approach with care, honesty, and humanity.

Ogungbile Emmanuel Oludotun